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Media: Conditions Apply
Throughout these past few years that I have been working on the project, I’ve reached out to various media outlets in Finland to garner some type of attention from them. So far, only one of those attempts has led to something substantial, and that was in early 2023 when the newspaper of my own county interviewed me. When I reached out to the arts journalist of the paper, I made it a point to let her know that what I was looking for was not a sob story on my abuse and trauma, but a contextual glance at my artistry, what I have turned my childhood trauma into. The journalist was interested in both me as a person and my art; she had checked out my Instagram page and blog articles and was on board with my wish of focusing on the art side of things, promising me to include the few selected scans of my illustrations. I was super excited, this was going to be the starting point of everything!
Mental Health Aesthetics
One of the greatest things about the internet is the community factor. No matter how cliched it sounds, I’ve never been part of a community of like-minded individuals – or at the very least I’ve never felt particularly welcomed in these spaces. So as is the case for a lot of people with similar background to mine, I’ve found community in the online world. Born in the first year of the new millennium, some of my earliest memories of being on the internet include chatting with my friends on Windows MSN and playing various games that typically had message forums attached to them. These MMOG’s were my second home as a Kid, as from there I found some resemblance of a group I could feel a type of connection to.
WARNING!
Have you ever heard of freak shows? Those exhibitions or circus fairs where people with physical deformities and disabilities were put up on display for “normal” folk to look at and be disgusted, fascinated, repulsed by. Thankfully freak shows have been left in the past, at least for the most part. But even after their prime time, we have continued on to treat disabled and chronically ill people with the same kind of disrespect as that of freak shows. And while the exhibitionists during the 1800’s were often paid for their labor as a “freak of nature”, now in the 21st century, we don’t get those kinds of privileges. So, to some extend, things have gotten worse instead of progressing. But isn’t that the nature of things nowadays in general?
Your Trauma Is Valid
Isn't it funny how people who don't know you and your story seem to have the strongest opinions on your life? It is always those who think they know better than you do who feel the need to let you know that, in fact, your traumatic experiences are not "real abuse". For years, I struggled to understand why this kept on happening to me, no matter the circumstances. People who have met me once make insane assumptions on my trauma based on nothing – or at least, that's what it always felt like to me.
The Brain Is An Organ
The history of medicine is very fascinating. I'm not claiming to be the most knowledgeable on it – and with my non-existent credentials, it would be insulting to say such a thing – but I am intrigued by the small bits of information I have managed to gather up in my noggin. Did you know that heroin was used as a cough medicine in the 1800's? Or that cocaine was used as a "wonder drug" of sorts, claimed to be able to cure depression, alcoholism, and impotence? Many of the now-deemed toxic chemicals were once used as medication for health problems. And of course, we can't forget lobotomy.
Your Mental Illness Is My Joke!
Humor is a very complicated and confusing thing. If I were to ever continue my university studies in linguistics, I think I would potentially pick a phenomenon somehow related to humor as a rhetorical device. It is used in countless different ways, in situations that are more or less applicable to a humorous conversation. These factors, too, are more or less defined by the parties involved in the discussion. This kind of subjectivity makes humor an impossible thing to define in an exact manner, because what someone else might deem as the joke of the century might be an incredibly offensive thing to say to someone else.
Spewing Out Slurs
Discrimination comes in various shapes and sizes, and I am no stranger to quite a few of them. Being a member of several marginalized communities, I have faced all kinds of bigotry in my time. Granted, I do want to make it clear that I have had it relatively easy when it comes to discrimination like homophobia, mainly because of my very loving and accepting family. In some ways, I have been lucky in these experiences, especially when compared to some of my loved ones. Though, that doesn't mean that I have been completely let out of the hook.
Spread Thin
How much pain does one human being have to endure in their life for it to be considered "too much"? When is it justifiable for that person to give up and not want to keep fighting anymore? Why is it that some people in this world are forever cursed with the worst kind of luck, with the worst kind of pain, and then just expected to keep going like it's nobody's business?